About the event
Welcome to the JIM!
The Jarmans Invitational Marathon will take place on Saturday, August 2nd at 12:01pm in Crozet, Virginia. Pretty much everything about this race sucks.
Course: The course sucks. The race starts at the intersection of Jarmans Gap Rd and Greenwood Rd in Crozet, Virginia. From there, runners will run up Jarmans - 2.9 miles and 1,522 ft of elevation gain, then turn around and come right back down 2.9 miles and 1,522 ft. Runners will repeat this lap five times for a total of 7,610ft elevation gain and loss over 29.0 miles. Jarmans is a steep gravel road, with some areas shaded and some areas in full sun. There are minimal scenic views. The summit of Jarmans is simply a muddy parking spot and an 'End State Maintenance' sign. You will run by a junkyard and several pit bulls. There are a lot of littered Bud Light cans lining the course. The train crosses Jarmans and may or may not be running during the race. The course is gonna suck.
Weather: The weather is going to suck. The race starts at 12:01pm, maximizing heat and sun exposure. There may be afternoon thunderstorms. If there is not, the road will likely be dry and dusty.
Aid Stations: The aid stations are going to suck. There will be water and warm beer. There will probably be some food. Andy Jones-Wilkins will be taunting you at the top aid station, while David Horton will be harassing you at the bottom. We will arrange for a Goodwill-used couch to be on the course halfway up.
Parking: Parking sucks. There is parking for only 3-4 cars at the start. We will plan on shuttling people from the Crozet Library parking lot in downtown Crozet and/or the Greenwood Community Center. Please note, you cannot park at Chiles Peach Orchard as they do not have adequate space for us!
Prizes: Some prizes will actually be cool, while most of the prizes will suck. There will be prizes for first place male and female, a prime prize for the first runner to reach the top on the first loop, and other random prizes.
Fame and Infamy: For those runners completing the Jarmans Invitational Marathon, you will live the rest of your days in fame and infamy. You will have shown mental and physical fortitude far beyond what is required for any other 29 mile hilly fun run. This is great training for Grindstone and Masochist. This is also a great event if your neighbor's kids frequently laugh at you because of your lack of accomplishments in life. But first, this race will suck.
Entry: The JIM is a fatass event - so it is free and welcome to all runners. If you are looking for an official, sanctioned event, this is not for you. Though this race will be sanctioned by the USATF - US Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms bureau due to the high use of these products along the course.
Contact: Any questions? Contact event directors Dan Spearin (email@example.com) or John Andersen (firstname.lastname@example.org)
As far as we know, no one has ever done a Jarmans Marathon. Fast people will probably average just under one hour per loop, while a back-of-the-packer might expect to average around 1:30-1:45 per lap
Local time: 4:32 AM
Fastest Ascent: 27:10, Nick DiPirro. 33:56, Sophie Speidel
Fastest Descent: 16:19, Matt Bugin. 23:49, Sophie Speidel
Andy Jones-Wilkins' fastest Ascent: 32:22
Andy Jones-Wilkins' fastest Decent: 19:19