SQUATCHY ONESIE FEST
"You guys should put on an event where everyone has to wear a onesie."
"That sounds like an AMAZING idea."
"It should be in the dead of winter."
And so the Squatchy Onesie Fest was born! Is it a ridiculous idea? You bet it is. Won't it be really cold in February? Yup, that's why you need to wear a onesie. Do they even make onesies in my size? Of course they do #amazon
Join us on Saturday February 18, 2023 at the Ramapo Valley County Reservation for the first annual SQUATCHY ONESIE FEST 5K-MARATHON! Come sporting your favorite onesie and get ready to make some trail running/hiking memories that will last a lifetime. Now when your non-running friends ask, "Hey, how was your 5K marathon?" You won't have to correct them!!
We are proudly partnering with the New York-New Jersey Trail Conference for this event and will be making a donation to the Conference after the trail party ends.
This is a runner/hiker friendly event! We LOVE having families come to our events, so make sure you register your kiddos to join in on the fun.
10AM Start Time - please check-in between 9:15am-9:45am
Please allow a few minutes to walk from the Reservation park parking lot over to the NYNJTC Headquarters.
This trail party starts and finishes at the NYNJTC Headquarters. When you get to the park, please park in the PARK PARKING LOT. The small lot at Headquarters is reserved for NYNJTC staff only. There is a short path through the woods that connects the two lots. We will have check-in at the NYNJTC Headquarters so you can hang out there before and after the race. There are real restrooms in the building too (#winning).
The "lollipop" course is 1.60 miles long. All runners and hikers will squatch the full course twice to complete the 5K. All runners/hikers need to come all the way back to Headquarters after the first loop so our timing system records your split.
With the exception of the small trail that connects Headquarters to the park, the entire lollipop course is a very wide gravel trail. The small trail that connects you to the park is a single track and is less than .20 mi long. The scenic loop goes all the way around Scarlet Oak Pond; it is not technical and it is very flat (only 112 ft of gain)! Check out the Strava link here: https://www.strava.com/segments/22173482
NEW YORK-NEW JERSEY TRAIL CONFERENCE
We are proud to partner with the New York-New Jersey Trail Conference! We will make a donation to the Trail Conference after the event using proceeds from the Onesie Fest as well as our trail party in March, the Double Squatch. The New York-New Jersey Trail Conference is a volunteer-powered organization that builds, maintains, and protects public trails. Trail Conference members can receive 10% off of registration; please email us email@example.com for the discount code!
FAMILIES, MILITARY, FRONTLINE & CLUB MEMBERS
We want the WHOLE family to come out to our events! We have a special discount code for families registering 3 or more Squatches in the same household. Please email firstname.lastname@example.org before you register so we can give you the code! Sassquad Trail Running is proud to offer 20% off all events to all active duty military and Veterans and frontline workers. Please email email@example.com before you register for an event so we can provide you with a discount code. NYNJ Trail Conference and South Mountain Conservancy members can receive 10% off of registration; please email us for the discount code!
Q: Can I bring my dog?
A: Sorry, but Snoopy has to stay at home for this race. Our liability insurance does not cover dogs; thank you for understanding!
Q: Can I sign my kids up for the Onesie Fest?
A: Yes! We want the WHOLE family to come out to our events! We have a special discount code for families registering 3 or more Squatches in the same household. Please email us (firstname.lastname@example.org) before you register so we can give you the code! Once you have the code, be sure to register your child separately and agree to the waiver for minors. And make sure to keep track of little Westley and Buttercup before during and after the race. We only have 1 search-party and they're already out there looking for Sasquatch.
Q: What's the weather like in Mahwah, NJ in February?
A: I'll explain and I'll use small words so you'll be sure to understand, you warthog faced buffoon. It will be cold. Probably. Maybe. It could be warm. Check the weather before the race and dress appropriately.
Q: This will be my first trail race. What do I need to know?
Q: No really, it is my first trail race! Any advice?
A: You fell victim to one of the classic blunders—the most famous of which is, “Never get involved in a land war in Asia”—but only slightly less well-known is this: “Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line”! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha…........ But seriously, we are SO EXCITED that you are choosing a Sassquad event for your first trail race! This is the perfect intro event as the trails are not very difficult. Come ready to have a great time and meet some awesome people!
Q: What food will you have at the aid station?
A: MLT – mutton, lettuce and tomato sandwichs. And miracle pills. The chocolate coating makes it go down easier. But you have to wait fifteen minutes for full potency. And you shouldn’t go in swimming after, for at least an hour.
A: No miracle pills. But we will have water (please BYO-cup/bottle!!) pre-packaged single-servings snacks for after the race.
Q: I could get lost in a brown paper bag. Will the course be marked?
A: We will have bright colored ribbons along the course and plenty at all of the turns.
Q: I don't want to run, are there any volunteer opportunities?
A: Yes! We always need Sassy Volunteers! Click the "Volunteer" button at the top of the page!
Q: Are there restrooms at the start/finish area?
A: There are restrooms at the start/finish area and portjohn's on the course.
Q: Me and my friend aren't registered for the race, but we're still planning on coming to run. We won't eat from the aid station or take a medal or swag. This is okay, right?
A: NO THIS IS NOT OKAY. This is called being a "race bandit" and it is stealing. Not paying for a race and running the race is stealing from the race organization (even if you're not taking food or swag). Don't do this at a Sassquad trail party or ANY other race. It's not okay. And if you hear about someone else doing this, call them out. If you bandit a race, you will be banned from registering for any of our Sassquad events.
BE A HERO
Join the Sassy Volunteer Squad! We need help with check-in, sweeping the course and cleaning up. Are you registered for a race that requires volunteer hours? We can sign-off on the hours that you log at the event! Volunteer to provide delicious food for the runners and we can sign-off on your prep time! We love our volunteer team and we are always looking to add more sassy members to the Volunteer Squad! Email us at email@example.com if you'd like to volunteer!
Thank you to our friends at Sneaker Factory, NJ! Sneaker Factory supports Sassquad Trail Running on and off the trails to help make the events as squatchtastic as possible! The Sneaker Factory is NJ's source for all things running: New Jersey's oldest and most well-known running store, originally opened in Millburn in 1978. Stop by one of our three convenient neighborhood locations and let us help you find the "perfect ride for every stride." Millburn, Florham Park and Basking Ridge.
SASSQUAD TRAIL RUNNING
We are a community of SASQUATCH-lovin' trail runners. Our goal is to provide FUN and challenging events for runners of all ages and paces. We like to think that we have a good sense of humor, a full arsenal of sarcastic wit, useless trivia facts and a deep appreciation for cinematic masterpieces (as evidenced multiple times already). Follow us on Instagram , and like us on Facebook to get all of our Squatchy updates. You can also join our Facebook group, "Sassquad Trail Runners" to connect with other runners and hikers!
Local time: 11:38 PM